2/03/2011

How to Poison Yourself AND More Arizona Birds

How to Poison Yourself Without Really Trying
(for those who missed the comment on the previous post or the status update on facebook):

Spend a few weeks cutting up metal foil, metallic paper, metallic Mylar, etc., with four huge Ionic Breezes running constantly. Minuscule metal molecules will spin around the room in an invisible maelstrom that will cut through eyes and skin like butter. (Obviously, you'll be breathing in the stuff, as well.) Make sure there is adhesive on every piece of metal foil so your skin and lungs will be saturated with waterproof, permanent glue. Finish by decorating everything with metallic markers containing xylene, a toxic solvent.

That's how I poisoned myself, anyway.

P.S. I'm planning on going birding for the first time this year tomorrow. Since I still can't see, I'm hoping my son will be my photographer. I'm hoping desperately that all goes well, but in the meantime I have more of my son's Arizona Birds to show everyone!

ARIZONA Pied-billed Grebe
More Arizona birds photographed by P. Wrublewski. This Pied-billed Grebe is one of the cutest birds I've never seen!

ARIZONA Pied-billed Grebe II
Another view of the Pied-billed Grebe.

Arizona green heron
Here's an awesome pic from a series of a hunting Green Heron.

Arizona green heron 2
The raised crest makes it look like a different bird altogether!

2 comments:

  1. I've never heard a story like that before! I hope you have a speedy and full recovery.

    ReplyDelete
  2. Oh my gosh..........you POOOOOR thing!!! Holy cow and all that jazz too. Wishing you the speediest recovery ever...

    ReplyDelete

I love positive comments, critical comments,and corrections most of all!